Today's Chicken Soup : It ain't a coup to be in a group

Of all the fears people have in today's times, one of them is the fear of being alone, being left out, fear of not having friends, close aides or having a confidante. The need of the hour is that we ask ourselves if we really need someone ? Do we really have to be in the company of random bunch of people to feel normal let alone survive? Let me try finding a path to the answers to these questions if unable to find the answers.
In many educational institutions, workplaces, the most common thing found is group-ism, people with vaguely similar likes and even more vague connections end up forming groups, without letting friendship breathe, whereas people who don't really believe in groups and stay aloof from these groups are considered weird and not so worthy to be friends with, however ironically they are the ones who compliment the introvert by saying "  It's a good thing you're not into groups and all" I wonder if they really feel this way then why are they in a group then? The root foundation of most of these groups is survival. "Everyone thinks that they are a lion/lioness however in this urban law of the jungle they have to survive like a pack of wolves", this isn't the gospel truth, if it is then where is it written ?, which manual for survival states that this is how one can survive in a certain environment ? These are just man-made rules made for one's convenience and the other's inconvenience. There are many who are strong enough to sail through without being a part of this farce, on the other hand there are many who give in to the pressure of being a part of a group, because they themselves don't know their worth as an individual, they go through the same journey as the white bird below.

Now look at this white bird trying to approach the other birds around her, the other birds don't bother to even respond to her, don't get me wrong for it's not the issue of dark and white. If one peels the layer of this superficial assumption and prejudice of color, one will see that the issue here is being different, the white one is different from the others. We humans are also like these dark birds as we also have the tendency to have only those in our groups who are to a certain extent just like us, not exactly yes men or our clones but someone similar, the problem is sometimes they are too similar that we find it uncomfortable and disturbing to have someone different join us, we never really observe or evaluate these new people because for all we knew they could be worth being friends. Such case of prejudice reminds me of a quote from a movie.

I don't want to be product of my environment, I want my environment to be a product of me

-Jack Nicholson (initial voice-over from the movie "The Departed")

When we, the introverts and loners start off our journey at such places we feel we are fine the way we are, we are happy and friends that can be counted in one hand will suffice but this whole hoopla of groups slowly starts spreading as an epidemic, this man-made ideology is shown as the natural way of living, it's considered a crime to not be in a group, and out of the peer pressure and the pressure of the ambiance created by this so called need to survive, even we slowly try to fit in groups or try to form our own groups, however because of being amateurs the results aren't really comforting.

Look at the bird here her head isn't really visible, as if hiding from something,but what ? Maybe her own self ? It so happens in this rat-race of being in groups that you are obliged by being in a group but on certain conditions, one of the topmost condition being to shed your original self and be like the others are in the group, "don't speak what you want to speak about, speak what others want to hear about," "If the members are practical, you have to learn to be practical too, your emotional nuances won't be tolerated" these are certain things I was told to do in order to survive. You do try this technique for a certain period but after a while as you are using this technique, bridge between the real you and this "group-member you" starts breaking, you try to maintain that balance too, but then this whole arrangement, this need for change to survive, this need to balance the real and the created aspects of your personality begin to suffocate you. You hide from yourself as you now feel confused as to who really are you?and if you are a changed you then why are you this changed you ?

If one stops itself at a point and begins to think about it they should certainly ask themselves these questions:

1. Isn't this whole system and paradoxical farce ?

2. How is one supposed to survive if one is to shed it's real self ? Don't I have my right to stay unique to succeed and look extraordinary and not mundane ?

3. Are these people worth changing for ? Are these people of my kind or wavelength ? Aren't they making me feel bullied or picking on me by constantly dictating as to how to stay in a group and how to survive which is funny because they themselves haven't seen the true big picture of this world and this life , so how would they know the truth ?

Sometimes you do meet people who act like your confidante and say that they are your true friends and that they will never leave your side, but when the opportunity arrives, they don't hesitate in joining other groups for their own survival and if you take a stand for yourself, they ignore you as if you have violated them in a certain way, such people are generally called "wolf in the skin of sheep" i find it funny because such wolves then join and follow a herd like sheep, so why so much pride in being a wolf when you act like sheep? Why be a wolf or a sheep to follow a pack or a herd when you can be the Lion and lead the pride?

No i don't ask you to be haughty and aggressively arrogant, but yes, the belief of being uniquely perfect the way you are and not getting influenced by the words of others would be an apt suggestion. One must believe in oneself and once this belief is strong you are self-satisfied, self-satiated and self-reliant, and once you reach this stage others will come to you, just don't have these expectations though, I know it sounds a very tricky procedure but it's really very effective.

Look even this bird looks all confident and looks the most attractive in her group, not again because of her color, but because she acknowledged, valued, respected and loved the fact that she is unique and need not change herself for anyone, or any group. She is not the ODD ONE OUT she is the ONE THAT STANDS OUT. the birds at the left also seem as if they are running to join and gaze at this white bird.

The way effort is being made to negate the ideology of the need of groups for survival, I would also like to make an effort to prevent another ideology from being created that all groups are fake, survival-sake or are a bunch of bullies, the fact that we judge the other group because they mistreated us would also not be a very noble thing to do, because hatred leads no where, maybe that's how their friendship was with which we couldn't connect, maybe that's how their ideology is which we don't relate too, maybe they are poor souls who seem this as a way of survival and are themselves unaware with the concept of friendships. One realizes true friendship in a group when one sees it, I have and I am fortunate enough to have friendly relations with a few groups like these, for the groups who unceremoniously treated me, well it's their choice to not look like colorful group of birds and look like a dull colored herd of sheep. Then again I don't see myself as a member of any group, nor do I pine to be in one, if I am destined to find a few friends who take me in their group or I end up having a friendly group of my own, then I'll say fortune has smiled at me from ear to ear. Maybe I am in that path of being in a group of friends only for the ulterior motive of friendship and not survival. I can then feel that I am in a human's world and not some urban jungle. Who knows I'll be the white bird of my group, in the end don't we all desire to be one of our groups ? although the key to that is "It ain't a coup to be in a group" so it's high time we free ourselves from this loop. 

May I have your Attention please !!!!!!

Is attention a want or a need ? maybe it is a want that comes to surface as a need. Philosophers have said that the best way of living is to not make an exhibition out of your life, but somewhere deep down we all want people to see, if not all but at least a portion, an aspect of our lives; we want privacy yet we need attention, no matter how much we want it the other way around.

What is attention in the first place ? what is its worth ? Why is attention one of the intangible property of ours that people crave for and why is it the other way round too ? the dictionary meaning of attention if one finds will be " the notice taken of someone or something, the regarding of someone or something as important or interesting"  the synonyms being observation, notice, surveillance etc.. so basically as I have said, when it comes to people seeing or ignoring us, our lives seem to be an embodiment of bigotry, hypocrisy, dichotomy or whichever word that explains the dual nature. 

We all want attention, we can't escape it, however whether we need it or not is clearly our choice. This desire for attention is a nature made law or a man made one is not clear yet, what is clear that it is an essential part of our lives, our jobs ask for attention, the people around us ask for our attention and from a relationship as well as a professional point of view we ask for attention from others, who are again trapped in the vicious circle of asking and giving attention. In this process of asking and paying attention we forget to ask the most important question to ourselves, " Is it worth it?" "Is it worth asking for attention from the person in front of me?" "Is is worth paying attention to the person asking for it?" Attention albeit intangible holds as much value as tangible money, you' cannot afford to waste nor can you beg for it at the cost of your self respect.

Yes, more than jobs and other priorities, my thought as per now lingers around the idea of exchange of attention between two people. The reason ? in today's world of hectic work and the rat-race of getting somewhere in the nick of time and then setting foot for another race to get somewhere else, we have no time to interact with our self let alone the people around us. We forget to ask the question of the worth of the other person's attention,we get it, without questioning it or ourselves as to how we got it at the cost of something which could be as valuable as our self-respect and even worse, we are happy with it. The reason being our loneliness, and when we are all alone and all of a sudden we get attention from a few people, we might not know how to handle it, we are overwhelmed by it, either we are too scared to react and we cower down or we feel too happy and expect more which might be lethal as the other person may end up calling you an "ATTENTION-SEEKER" or in today's time the label is "ATTENTION-SEEKING WHORE". 

If asked me instead of whore the term "DOG" would sound more decent, at least compared to whore, dog makes more sense, reason being that running after attention is like a dog running after cars, in the end the question remains the same "What are you going to do with it ?" Believe me, it's not worth it, especially when the other person makes you run after them, makes you beg for their time and ears, especially when he/she doesn't listen but just hear to what you have to say and keep you on the hook when it comes to giving attention because honestly, you don't matter to them anymore.

While we are discussing about the worth of other people's attention and their need for attention, it is time we check ourselves too, one question that's hovering in my mind right now is that in the need of attention from others, mostly the outsiders who aren't even worth to be in the inner-circle of my loved ones but we chose to place them there, have we taken for granted the attention of the ones who really value us ? the ones who did let go of us to crave attention from the ones we wanted to but deep inside were yearning for us? sadly most of the times i get the answer in affirmative. Maybe this post will be a way for me to apologize to those loved ones of mine and a promise to give them my complete attention and rightfully ask for mine; It is also a thank you to those people worthless of our attention and whose attention held no value in reality, a thank you, for ignoring me so that i could find the worthy people in my life. 

In terms of attention, we humans alas are like the dog who grasps for another bone but in reality it's just an illusion for our bones re more valuable than the ones that seem luring and tempting. So the other question that comes across my mind as I attempt to conclude, am  I an "ATTENTION-SEEKER" ?

Yes, I am, I am an "ATTENTION SEEKER", for I seek the attention of the ones who love me and value me and also the ones who seem to value me for now, are they worth it or not ? time will tell, but more than  attention their mere presence and the warmth that they radiate which assures me that I am not lonely in the crowd, I am not unloved, I have a value and special place in their heart, that the bond they share with me is worth all the trials and tests of time. The feeling one can get is yes, they are worth it to see a certain aspect of my life if not the entire life. If this is all i crave for, and this is all I ask for and this is all I wish to give to someone who values me as much as I do, I like most humans am seeking for AFFECTION, not ATTENTION, sadly other humans don't know it yet. I, on the other hand can unabashedly say to my loved ones that I want your attention, I need your attention and I have a  right on your attention too in certain way, for I , I am not an ATTENTION-SEEKER, I am an AFFECTION-SEEKER, and  I am not ashamed of it because this is a need of other humans around us too. If they are worth it and see you worthy too, give them and don't hesitate before asking from them.

Embracing my Emotional self..

"Oh god he is so emotional", " don't let the emotions get the better of you", " he is an emotional fool", " there is no place for emotions or sentiments here" we have come across such lines so many times in life; it makes me wonder why this much apathy to emotions ? why being emotional is considered wrong ? Am i too emotional or the surroundings around me are too apathetic ? I understand the value of emotional intelligence and practicality and their needs but sadly i find myself in the era of emotional ignorance and apathy.

Emotions are being treated with disdain or suppression, i believe the moment i mentioned the word emotion it may have induced a lot of negative feelings and vibes like that boredom, tendency to ignore, condescension and practicality. Why such negativity for emotion though ? Emotion is a universe of its own, and it is a universe that resides within us. Yes it's true, even science tells us how release of certain chemicals and hormones lead to experiencing the certain kind of emotions. So the question arises as to why to treat something within us with disdain as if it is some filth residing inside us?

Joy and pleasure are emotions as much as sadness and anger, other emotions being jealousy, resentment, jubilation, elation etc.. so like i said emotion is a universe in its own, it is a home to all the positive and negative feelings, so emotions being labelled as a negative aspect within us is a poor judgement.

I understand practicality is the need of  the hour in today's dark times where people are emotionally exploited but practicality is what it is "need of the hour" sadly it has become a "way of living", long story short, people have stopped LIVING and are "just living", the liveliness in LIVING is missing. No one asks us to be emotionally open in front of everyone but in solidarity with our own self we aren't emotionally open, instead we suppress our emotions hide our feelings from our very own self. The reason ? if we do it with our self we'll be able to do it with others too. It is a nice idea on a superficial level but if peel out all the layers you see that you are not suppressing your feelings but suffocating them you aren't covering your feelings but asphyxiating them, in other words you are killing a part of yourself, because your emotions are a part of you. We torture our emotional self like this in front of our loved ones also, the ones we care about also begin to see the emotional abstinence, but why do we do it ? the answer most people say " we don't want to end up getting hurt" but they forget "getting hurt" is also an emotion one experiences; so you are suppressing your emotions and torturing them so that you won't encounter one but are ready give birth to a new emotion of "self pity" and "self hatred" for doing the same ? sorry this in no way makes any logical or practical sense to me, nor would it make sense to anyone who is emotionally sound and intelligent. Practicality is a shield, an armor, but we are not at war all the time.

Another hurdle emotions face is the gender bias, yes gender bias hasn't spent human emotions too. If a man is seen breaking down into tears, the genuine response would be " stop crying like a little girl" " are you a sissy stop crying like a loser".. but if a woman even sheds a single drop of tear let alone cry you will see her surrounded by people with tissues in their hands and sympathies in their words " oh poor baby" "oh sweetheart, don't lose hope".. as a man i ask for my rights to be emotional, my rights to cry out loud to express my sorrow without my manhood being questioned, i ask for my right to have my emotions being respected too. I am Man enough to cry it out and cleanse my eyes than drinking it all in and ruin my liver.

 I am an "Emotionally Naked" person, i have no shame of a nudity of this kind. I cry when the upheavals in me are too much for me to handle, I cry when i am heartbroken. I am a Man and I cry too, maybe that's why i can understand my emotions well, I don't torture my emotions, nor do i ignore my conscience, i am aware of the feelings around me, to express them or not is my choice and right, but yes i acknowledge them, I don't fight with them, instead i choose to embrace them, to celebrate them when in a state of happiness, to pacify them or to cry with them when engulfed by sorrow, to make them understand where we are going necessarily overboard where it isn't needed because my emotions are a part of me I can't detach myself from, who would want to live a life where you end up taking out a part of yourself ? 

Yes if one feels the tendency to open up emotionally in front of others, the only question one must ask is "is that person worth it ?", one has to see how much they and their emotions are valued before opening up and letting them into such an intimate part of ourselves, we also have to lets say hold our emotions not restrict them so as to not seem emotionally dependent or burden ourselves on our loved ones, but in the midst of all this we mustn't ignore, suppress, or be indifferent toward our emotions, it's a part of us, we shouldn't abandon it to it's fate because of the norms of the society or ways of success, it's high time we embrace and accept them fearlessly, shamelessly and this in its true sense would be "Emotional Intelligence"

"Our logic, Knowledge and sense of practicality gives birth to  our PERSONALITY , but it is our emotions and feelings that make us a PERSON in the first place"

How will you shape up your personality, if you suppress and ignore your emotions ?

Run with your MO

Life is analogous to many things, pleasant ones like seasons or violent ones like a war, grim ones like a struggle but the most common analogy has been of with journey. Yes life is a journey they say.. you come across hurdles which you tackle, you take rest when you feel tired of this journey, you meet passersby who seem to take the same path as you do, you come across certain points in this journey when you want to stay but you know deep down that you have to MOVE ON..

This phrase has been our oldest companion in this journey of life. Something bad happened in childhood? Move on.. you were heartbroken in your teens and adulthood ? Move on..Your children haven't been the ideal ones to take care of you in your old age ? Move on... Like i said this phrase has been with us more than e have been with us; but what does one exactly mean by moving on? To forget the past or to focus on the present or both ? the most assumed answer would be the last one, however like most remedies of life this one is also easier said than done.

With this companion of moving on begins a sub-journey, a journey of self reminding, self re-discovery and a journey of self consoling and appeasement. If i am to share my experience my MO (move on) companion has been too cruel with me, then again each and everyone's MO has been with them. It gives birth to sudden mood swings within you, at first you feel happy, high in spirits and light in mind but one trigger of memories and you feel your world has come crashing down; it is a reminder that you aren't giving time yourself, you're jumping to conclusions, the silver lining ? it boosts an energy and eagerness in you to bounce back in life. 

My MO has addressed me in every way possible, it has pampered me like my parents, sympathized me like the strangers around me, consoled me like my near ones who are ready to show concern anytime but the most impacting one is the tone of being harsh and scolding one as our mind feeds on all the soft ones bringing us to the stage of victim, your MO then has to be strict with you to remind you that you're not a victim, you're a survivor. You definitely can't blame the mediums through which your MO is harsh with you, as those mediums i.e. people are also accompanied by their respective MOs who are working on them extensively. 

Your MO is also your knight in the shining armor it fights its arch rival that resides in your mind and heart like a parasite, and keeps dragging you down like a jive, your memories with the concerned incidents and people. The memories good and bad both come down hard on you, the good memories that remind you how beautiful times were those and how dreadful things seem now, the bad memories that tend to show from which point things started going south bringing you as the plaintiff and the accused in the court of who was right and who was wrong and what and all could have been done to salvage the situation, in such cases one mostly blames oneself imprisoning you to guilt and if you find others wrong then you are under imprisonment of hatred, either way you are not free, that's what your MO is helping you avoid, Such is the battle of MO, no matter how harsh it is, it is a good friend that keeps you strong and immune, or at least tries to.

This MO is none other than your own inner voice, your own intuition, whom we tend to give a deaf ear because we are surrounded by the voices of memories and temptations, yet it tries to come out of this inner cacophony and tells you what you ought to do, how you ought to do, it is your only best friend.

 Its good to stop by certain points in life condition being you remember when you have to leave, no matter what analogy you give to life we are going through phases like a long roller coaster ride, one has to Move On, one has to be with their MO and listen to it. If the baggage of the past tends to come with you which may weaken your pace towards the future, take a stop in your present and find a nice baggage counter to dump it there forever, and before that baggage gets to know.. run with your MO..

Thinking about the thoughts

What exactly are our thoughts? Do they have any influence on our lives ? Did we ever give birth to the thoughts which keep traversing through the various horizons of our body? Do we have any control over these thoughts? We delve deeper and we increasingly encounter such questions. To me if ever asked such questions my answer would be that thoughts are nothing but the manifestation of our perspectives, our knowledge, our feelings, our observations and many more. These thoughts can passed by as thoughts but if we decide to cling on to it they themselves can give birth to a lot of things, our dreams, aspirations, our fears our perspectives in order to sum it up thoughts can show us our future course of action and be our spectacle to see the world, to see their own life. Confusingly intriguing isn't it ? Let me delve deeper then.

In our sleep we dream a lot, but a thing never noticed is that we never dream of something which is alien to us or to our life, we dream of our past which may be pleasant or horrifying, we may dream of our present as well but if someone says that they can dream the future, i would beg to differ with them, no one really dreams their future, they may dream what they aspire to see or what they don't to see in their future, such  visuals which we can call as extra sensory perceptions are nothing but our thoughts only. Arising from our minds which is the biggest and if i may say so the most complex playwright who shows us a variety of upcoming scenes of our lives. These scenes are nothing but the consequences of what we are going to do. It's like a warning or a motivation depending on what we have in our mind. Some dreams are like riddles , they don't make any sense but they have elements of our past and present , if we wish to decode we may get some answers we yearn to get. You must be wondering why am I talking about dreams when actually had intended to explain the role and impact of thoughts, but the truth is that they are somewhere interconnected, if i am to give a basic example if i hate someone too much to forgive him i may dream of killing him or causing him some sort of harm but at the same time if i dream of ignoring him that person may never come in front of us again. What we think is what we dream and what we dream is the creator of our ideas , our plan of actions and our approach towards life. Hence we don't see or dream of our future but our thoughts mark its inception, we can let it be that way or if we change it we may change our future.

In psychological terms our mind is of three levels, the conscious, the subconscious and the unconscious. The conscious mind thinks of the events of the present, observes things happening around it and comes to a conclusion, the unconscious mind is like a storage facility consisting of facts and events unknown to us at present but when reminded by any event or person, these facts and events take a leap to the conscious mind. The subconscious mind however is a deep well of feelings, irrespective of them being positive and negative haves them together, it helps us have a perspective and at the same time gives us a choice to be biased  or not to be biased. For instance being bullied in school causes deep resentment in us towards the doers at that point of time our subconscious mind gives options like being oblivious of the present and crave for revenge for the rest of your life, be fearful of people around you and let them be oblivious of your existence or be strong enough to let it go because you trust your conscious mind to evaluate and assure you that whatever happened wasn't your fault however you need not give a statement to anyone, you don't owe one to anybody and the other way around,

There are three polarities of our thoughts: Positive, Negative and Neutral. Rhonda Byrne the author of the famous book the secret says that we should think positively, think of what we desire rather than thinking of what we detest because what we think is what we see before us, what we think is what we get, what we think is what we attract. These thoughts do come in a variety and in an uncontrollable speed, that we may miss paying attention to many of them but its the negative thoughts hat come first. We may think that we are being attracted by these negative thoughts but negative thoughts are not all that powerful as they seem to be , we choose to think negatively because its easier than thinking positively with difficult situations in front of us, giving up once is easier than attempting a thousand times.

Dark times lie ahead, one must choose between what is right and what is easy 

                                                                                                                   -Albus Dumbledore

Its nothing but escapism, if we we want to think positively we can do it instantly, only then will we master the art of controlling our thoughts than have it control you and lead you to a path of chaos.


Each and every one of us thinks that they have seen the world, what they really want to tell us is what they have experienced which actually is garnished by what we think about what and all we have faced in our life which leads to a perspective towards life towards people, towards us and this perspective becomes an aspect of our own personality of what we were, what we are and what we can choose to be.

        I have no guru, it's my own personal experience that has enlightened me
                                                                                                                            - Gautama Buddha
While writing i was engulfed in many thoughts, more like being crowded by an army of salesmen trying to sell me their products. I willingly entered this maze which is easier to get into and at the same time harder to get out of , but while writing this conclusion i see myself emerging out of an abyss, to know what to think and to accept the thoughts i wish to have. Never knew my mind, my brain was so capable, Now i can steer it to any direction i wish, i have that power and for your mind you have that same power as well.

 

Woman Inside a Man and Man Inside a Woman

Its the festival of Navratri which will go on for five more days and five more nights , its thee festival that celebrates the power named Woman. 
   Woman in itself is another name of power and when i say the word power i mean the power of will, influence, wisdom, observation ,tolerance and patience. Its a stupid thought to measure the tolerance level of woman because the levels of pain a woman goes through to give birth to a baby and bring a new life into this world is immeasurable and we all know that a man is not capable enough to give . birth to a baby; and if you talk about physical strength which man claims to have more than a woman , you can find such strength in wild animals wandering around the forest, the main question here is that if you don't have the strength to control the reigns of your mind which gallops like a wild horse or if you don't have the strength to keep the self belief within you intact when surrounded by discouraging and condescending situations then all your effort to make yourself physically strong is futile. 
Lets face it we are not as patient as a woman ; no doubt we men go through a lot of suffering and tough situations in this funny and amusing journey of life but in this path we crib and whine about those situations too whereas a woman suffers silently and doesn't say a word and when we hear the story of a successful woman's life we shed at least one drop of tear and we accept it too that had we been in her place we would have killed ourselves and would have given up on life , if you don't believe me then try to know about a woman called "oprah winfrey "  probably her journey to the pinnacle of success might help you understand what you can't by reading this blog.
Thus my guy friends i have a peace of advice for you if you want to be called a real man , a true man and that advice would be to "give birth to the woman inside you" ; yes that's right instill the woman inside you. Show chivalry and abandon chauvinism ; think from your heart too when required , follow your instincts , listen to your inner conscience , control your desires and baseless lusts which takes you no where in life  , try to recognize and control the  "ego of masculinity"  that we all men are born with .
We all men are born with two things that are within us i assume even before our birth , one being our ego of masculinity and the other of  "our feminine nature" . Yes we do have a feminine side in us which we need to recognize and instill the virtues of that side and control the vices of it . We are always provided choices and in this case too we are given two alternatives to choose your feminine side or embrace the ego of masculinity and we always end up doing the latter. 
     I ask you to give it a try to go with the former alternative and see for yourself that how do you progress in life . I don't say that our ego of masculinity will perish instead it will taunt you and tempt you to choose it again all you have to do is keep a check on your ego . 
         To my female friends and readers i don't think i need to say much, but take pride in being a woman , abandon fear and take a stand against prejudice , instill self belief , wisdom and "follow your dreams " like "kalpana chawla" had said because doing this will "give birth to the man inside you "  because in the end it's all about making your choices .We men ought to know that the Shiva whom we pray is just one half , the other half is called sati/parvati but primarily she is called "SHAKTI" .
I have been surrounded by the presence of women in my life whose influences and teachings have made me what today i am in front of you my readers, I respect all those women who have been and still continue to be in my life deeply . I have also humiliated and ill-treated few of those women in some incidents and when i look back at them i feel ashamed of myself and curse the ego within me that made me do this for which i might never forgive myself  till the last breath exhaled by me . I consider this as a way to show my respect , remorse for all ill said and done by me to them . And i urge all of you to introspect yourself and give these feelings of mine a little bit of thought .

My Purpose of WRITING and your purpose of READING !!!

I will be honest in this post of mine ; apart from expressing my views and thoughts about certain aspects of life I had started this blog to fulfill a dream which looks faded and vague for the time being . A dream of becoming a writer , to write my thoughts in a direct manner like this blog or in a fictitious one like novels or short stories. I now imagine myself  co-writing a book with an author as famous as Durjoy Dutta for now ; to write a novel like my idols Amish Tripathi and Ashwin Sanghi a.k.a. Shawn Hagins is a distant dream for now, not that I am thinking low of myself  because i want to accomplish these dreams of mine too, but for now i want to take these baby steps and all i need is your feedback, love and support.

Your role is important for any other novel of any novelist for that matter to work. I as a reader believe that if read between the lines we can know what the writer is trying to tell us , what are his/her feelings, in other words we connect with the author; the story may have many loop-holes or myths which seem too amusing to be believed but  if we widen our gaze we can gain enough knowledge to enlighten ourselves all we need is a perspective to read novels . If we do this a novel based on fiction will also a whole new level of importance.

My first instance of enlightenment was when I read the Mahabharat , my most favorite story till date . There is no evidence of this story being based on real events , no evidence that the characters of that story ever existed . If read with a very rational mind the story seems very ridiculous, unreasonable and not convincing enough just because we were conditioned since childhood that the story is true and when we grew up we saw it in a rational manner and criticized it . When i read it I learned something , a lesson that i never will forget and i don't even wish to forget it " Atrocities done to a woman will lead to your very own destruction in the end; a woman might have said or done something wrong to you but your act of attacking her modesty and chastity will not justify the reason of your act . We humans are in the intermediate position between gods and demons. We have the vices such as Lust , greed , jealousy, insecurity, and many more such vices ,well i admit that i do have them in me  but if we strengthen our minds enough that we can suppress these vices to an extent that they don't seem visible to the world around us we can win the world's love and respect and if we dont control them and let them bring the worst of us then we are as good as the ruins of the world's bloodiest war." that's what i have learnt .But it saddens me that giving the reference of this story the society has went on to suppress women , thought of them to be a reason of war , a cause of conflict between brothers . This is the interpretation of just one story , do we know how many such novels were misinterpreted by us everyday ??

Its time we introspect our minds and change our approach towards them . This will in turn help us understand the human nature in a subtle manner , if not the human nature we can understand our nature , we can rediscover ourselves  our joy would know no bounds once we did this . If we do this even we can start inking our thoughts and let the world know what do we think and share our thoughts and views. Everyone and anyone can become a writer .

I always thought of myself as an introvert and a person who is shy who keeps his thoughts and desires to himself , but if this is the truth why am i writing it for the whole world to read ??? and after i ask this question to myself i realize that i can open up in  front of the wold and share my thoughts without any pre-conceived notions and fear and have a clear mind rather than a prejudiced one. This assumptions of writers being introvert is a false assumption because through their writings they are just trying to talk to you , their approach however is different than usual ones so all we need to do is respond and as said we can't a friend as loyal as a book .